Current:Home > ScamsThis ‘Love is Blind’ contestant's shocked reaction to his fiancée went viral. Can attraction grow? -Capital Dream Guides
This ‘Love is Blind’ contestant's shocked reaction to his fiancée went viral. Can attraction grow?
View
Date:2025-04-17 05:59:56
"Love Is Blind" has returned to Netflix for its sixth season − and, oh boy, is its premise getting put to the test.
The show, which sees several singles date and get engaged before ever seeing what the other looks like, has prompted a discussion (and plenty of jokes) online recently for one contestant's stunned reaction to his fiancée. Contestant Jimmy Presnell seemed smitten with Chelsea Blackwell when she told him she has been told she looks like Megan Fox; but, when the two finally meet in person, he is in disbelief − and not in a good way.
Presnell and Blackwell's romance has been rocky since then, and relationship experts say their interactions on the show and the subsequent discourse online highlights interesting points about physical attraction and expectations in dating.
Attraction is a tricky thing. Sometimes it's there; sometimes it's not. It's not something that can be forced, but it is something that can grow over time, at least in some respects, experts say.
"I fully believe that attraction can grow over time as you form more of an intellectual and emotional connection and you get to know somebody," says Blaine Anderson, a dating coach for men. "I tell my clients this all the time: You have to be attracted to your partner. For a romantic relationship, that is a requirement. But it doesn't have to be instant sparks or instant physical attraction."
Can attraction grow? It's complicated
Whether or not attraction grows depends on what kind of attraction you're talking about, says Sara Nasserzadeh, a social psychologist and author of the book "Love by Design: 6 Ingredients to Build a Lifetime of Love." She draws a distinction between physical and sexual attraction.
Physical attraction, she says, has to do with finding the other person good-looking. Sexual attraction, on the other hand, has more to do with chemistry, connection and intimacy, and Nasserzadeh describes it as that "very intense draw that you have for somebody."
According to Nasserzadeh, the latter can often improve in time. The former, however, is tougher to grow if its not felt whatsoever in the beginning of a relationship, especially for men.
Still, Nasserzadeh adds, it's important to remember attraction has many layers − and different layers are going to be more or less important to different people. For instance, many people may find that a strong intellectual or emotional attraction to their partner is more important to them than a strong physical attraction.
"People are able to expand their ideas of attraction, because the meaning of attraction is, 'Why do you want to be around the other person?' " Nasserzadeh says. "It could be for so many different reasons."
'The ick' is all over TikTok.It may be ruining your chance at love.
Anderson says first date jitters and initial awkwardness are also normal and tend to get confused for a lack of physical or sexual attraction.
"You have to remember a first date, especially if you meet online, or even in the case of 'Love is Blind' if you haven't seen each other yet, it's going to be a little bit awkward," she says. "It's going to take a little time for both parties to get comfortable and therefore to be the best version of themselves."
In some cases, not finding someone immediately attractive can actually be a good thing, because it allows you to see who they are beyond their looks. This is why strong romantic relationships may emerge between people who start off as friends.
"When that attraction grows over time... you're getting to know them for more than just surface-level attraction," she says. "And surface-level attraction isn't enough on its own for a long and lasting relationship."
Is 'the spark' a red flag?Sometimes. Experts say look for this in a relationship instead
Social media and why it's harder to find people attractive in real life
There are many reasons why people have certain preferences for what they find physically attractive. One is what Nasserzadeh calls the exposure factor: In general, people are going to feel attracted to the kinds of people they're regularly exposed to.
This means that, in the era of social media, people's standards and preferences for what's attractive have been warped. If someone spends too much time gawking at edited photos of models and heavily made-up influencers on their phone, they're likely going to have a harder time finding everyday people attractive.
Anderson advises people to take stock of why they may not find someone physically attractive and to spend time off social media to see if their preferences change.
"I tell my clients all the time, you shouldn't be seeking out someone who looks like an Instagram model because even Instagram models don't look like Instagram models in real life," she says. "Everyone is looking at a highlight reel of edited photos and even AI at this point of what they think is beautiful. And that's just not real reality or what is necessarily realistic."
Nasserzadeh wants people to know physical attraction isn't the only important ingredient for a relationship.
"There are more reasons to be around another person," she says. "As long as all of those points of attraction serve the shared vision that they're trying to create together, then they're good to go."
Have you heard of 'relation-shopping'?It might be why you're still single.
veryGood! (19968)
Related
- Appeals court scraps Nasdaq boardroom diversity rules in latest DEI setback
- Texas attorney general refuses to grant federal agents full access to border park: Your request is hereby denied
- Amber Glenn becomes first LGBTQ+ woman to win U.S. Women's Figure Skating Championship
- Tesla recalls nearly 200,000 cars over software glitch that prevents rearview camera display
- Taylor Swift Eras Archive site launches on singer's 35th birthday. What is it?
- Vince McMahon resigns from WWE after allegations of sexual assault
- Proof Harry Styles and Rumored Girlfriend Taylor Russell Are Living While They’re Young
- Selena Gomez and Her Wizards of Waverly Place Family Have a Sweet Cast Reunion
- Appeals court scraps Nasdaq boardroom diversity rules in latest DEI setback
- John Harbaugh credits Andy Reid for teaching him early NFL lessons
Ranking
- The company planning a successor to Concorde makes its first supersonic test
- Crew extinguish fire on tanker hit by Houthi missile off Yemen after US targets rebels in airstrike
- Hold on to Your Bows! The Disney x Kate Spade Minnie Mouse Collection Is on Sale for up to 60% Off
- Motor City awash in 'Honolulu Blue' as Lions spark a magical moment in Detroit history
- Grammy nominee Teddy Swims on love, growth and embracing change
- Police: Philadelphia officer shot after scuffle with person in store; 2nd officer kills suspect
- 33 people have been killed in separate traffic crashes in eastern Afghanistan
- Police: Philadelphia officer shot after scuffle with person in store; 2nd officer kills suspect
Recommendation
In ‘Nickel Boys,’ striving for a new way to see
Two teenage boys shot and killed leaving Chicago school
Police: Philadelphia officer shot after scuffle with person in store; 2nd officer kills suspect
Haley faces uphill battle as South Carolina Republicans rally behind Trump
Woman dies after Singapore family of 3 gets into accident in Taiwan
With the World Stumbling Past 1.5 Degrees of Warming, Scientists Warn Climate Shocks Could Trigger Unrest and Authoritarian Backlash
Two teenage boys shot and killed leaving Chicago school
Mali, Niger and Burkina Faso withdraw from West Africa’s regional bloc as tensions deepen